For those of you who are Jewish, L’Shanah Tova to you and yours. May you have a wonderful, healthy, happy, peaceful new year.

I love the fresh clean-slate of a new year. The flip of a calendar page brings so much hope and potential.

This year there were children at our holiday table. My children. Mine, even if for a short time. It was amazing, exhausting, chaotic and a dream come true.

With all my heart I hope that next years holiday table has three children at it, PBS, LMC and a child not yet conceived but loved and prayed for every single day.

I want desperately to have a chance in the stirrups. I ache to create our child. I want to see the second pink line and the beautiful word pregnant on a digital. I want doubling, tripling betas and the sheer joy of hearing the heartbeat for the first time.

I hope this year brings me my chance. I have waited so long.